


Tell Me How I'm Supposed to Live Without You (Now that I've Been Loving You So Long)

by br0ken_hands



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Grief/Mourning, Hurt/Comfort, Multi, Pre-Relationship, Sharing a Bed, Spoilers for episode 115, just two gals being pals mourning dead lovers and also maybe falling a little bit in love again, you know just that typical angsty shit we love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-30
Updated: 2018-08-30
Packaged: 2019-07-04 17:27:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 839
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15845952
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/br0ken_hands/pseuds/br0ken_hands
Summary: "I'm sorry I didn't manage to come here sooner, the Earth Ashari needed some help after a small herd of giants stumbled across them and caused so much havoc they couldn't both rebuild and watch over the portal at the same time and-"Vex'ahlia lets out a watery laugh and shakes her head fondly. "It's fine, Keyleth. You got here in time for Percy's funeral and that's what matters."orThe Lord of Whitestone is dead and the world seems awfully cold in a bed far too empty as the Widow of Whitestone mourns.





	Tell Me How I'm Supposed to Live Without You (Now that I've Been Loving You So Long)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Mistressofmyownactions](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mistressofmyownactions/gifts).



The bed feels too big without him. The first time this occurs to Vex, it's after Percy's ashes have been interred to the family crematorium under Whitestone and night has fallen upon the mourning city once more. Lady Vex'ahlia de Rolo, once Baroness of the First House of Whitestone and Grand Mistress of the Grey Hunt, now the widow of Whitestone, lays in the bed she shared with her husband not but five nights ago when his body was still warm and full of life, wrapped tight in his embrace. Death had come quickly for Lord Percival Fredrickstein Von Musel Klossowski de Rolo, the third of his name. One moment he had been alive and well, toiling at the forge as he so often did, and in the next, he lay prone on the floor, not moving. By the time the servants found him, the Matron of Ravens had swept his soul beneath her wings and no ritual could bring him back. A sudden stopping of the heart, the clerics had declared, and Vex had wondered if they were talking about her instead of the cold, stiff body of her dead husband laid bare on the table before them. 

The funeral had been a blur. Lord Percival's body was placed in state for three days and three nights for friends, family, delegations, and the citizens of Whitestone to pay their final respects. It was Pike Trickfoot, Champion of Sarenrae, who presided over the funeral, speaking little, saying much, and when it came time to light the pyre upon which her love's body lay, all Vex could see as she touched the blazing torch to the wood was flame licking up the sides of her vision as Thordak scorched the earth before her time and time again. 

'It's only right,' she thinks, laying on her back and staring at the ceiling, fingers picking at the threads of the covers that lay undisturbed beneath her, 'for Percy to be sent off in flame. To live by fire and to leave by it too.'

The children had taken to their father's death about as well as could have been expected. Their oldest, Vax'ildan, had taken his father's death much like his namesake might have: with stoicism tinged with despair, and with an oath to raise his siblings as his late-father would have. 

A knocking on the door shakes Lady Vex'ahlia from her thoughts. That would probably be him at the door.

"Come in."

But the head that peeks in is not adorned with raven-black hair. Rather, orange hair and freckles meet Vex'ahlia's vision as Keyleth pops her head in, a gentle smile on her face.

"Hey, Vex."

"Keyleth," Vex sits up on the edge of the bed, straightening out her nightgown. "I wasn't expecting you."

Keyleth glides into the room, closing the door behind her with a quiet click, and approaches. "Can I sit down?"

"Of course."

The mattress sinks a little as Keyleth settles herself. Vex'ahlia hadn't had much time to visit Keyleth in some time and the years, though many since Vox Machina's adventures ended, barely showed on her freckled face. Yet another reminder of the near-immortality the Voice of the Tempest wields and the ever-present approach of death at the door.

"I'm sorry I didn't manage to come here sooner, the Earth Ashari needed some help after a small herd of giants stumbled across them and caused so much havoc they couldn't both rebuild and watch over the portal at the same time and-"

Vex'ahlia lets out a watery laugh and shakes her head fondly. "It's fine, Keyleth. You got here in time for Percy's funeral and that's what matters."

Keyleth must have seen Vex'ahlia's face fall at the mention of her late husband, and her heart breaks. "Oh, Vex."

Vex'ahlia feels a warm pair of gangly arms wrap around her and she tucks her head into Keyleth's chest. For the first time since Percy's coffin was closed, she allows herself to cry.

Keyleth holds her impossibly closer, stroking her back as she feels Vex begin to soak through her shirt with tears and snot. "Hey, Vex? Do you want me to stay here with you tonight? I mean, it's okay if you say no-"

She's cut short by a short nod into her chest, and then another heaving sob from the woman in her arms. This wouldn't be their first night spent in each other's arms, and Keyleth's heart aches to think that this might not be the last. She wonders if she looked just as impossibly small when it had been Vex holding her night after night in bed, trading soft words and warm embraces after Vax had left them so suddenly. 

Gently, she rearranges them to lay on the bed, always keeping Vex as close to her as possible. Draping the covers softly over them, Keyleth presses a kiss to the crown of the Baroness' head. "I love you, Vex."

Vex doesn't respond, just curls up tighter around Keyleth. A little distance away, a crow caws.

**Author's Note:**

> I love myself a bit of Perc'ahlia but Vexleth will forever be everything I want and need.  
> To my favourite gremlin, congrats on finishing C1, or being spoiled on the ending, which sucks but it meant you could read this sooner. Already missing sharing my midnights with you, don't get kicked by a kangaroo or whatever you Australians do out there <3.
> 
> Tumblr: frumpkinspocketdimension  
> Discord: SweetBabyRae#0967


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